The ability to talk to parrots and have them talk back to you

The power to turn your bones into molten lead.

The power to have superhuman strength. But I have to jack off to do so.

The power of being able to fly, but only on February 30th.

The power to permanently grow huge wonderful extremely heavy dragon wings, which do nothing but to weight you down and stand in the way. Fly? Nope, in fact you cant even walk now.

having superpowers during the inquisition

The power to die at any moment you want.

The ability to control the universe everytime you lick your own elbow!

Levitation Power but only 3 inch from ground,

The power to sneeze scissors

The ability to turn only your car in the direction in which the president of Zambia is looking.

the ability to cure anyone but only if you apply their injury to yourself

The power to fly with your feets on the ground

The power to fart 5 times bigger

The power to walk over crisp packets 25% more quietly than the average person

The power to fight inanimate objects that pose no threat to you

The power of love

The power of always having small, thin clothes in the winter.

THE POWER TO TYPE EVERYTHING IN CAPS-LOCK

The power to jump, but only on the ground.

the power to start a new wave band with a neon Open sign, a single bath salt, and a wet Tibetan ritz cracker.

The power to put out light from your butt

The ability to have all your dreams be nightmares that you remember vividly.

The power to be superman on a planet without a sun

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!