the power to destroy galaxies but only when drunk or high

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The power to be immune to every third bullet.

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The ability to fly but only for 5 seconds and when you are on an oily floor in tube socks being chased by 10 Puerto Rican woman.

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The power to push any muffin button, but u get no muffins

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The power to shoot poop balls when you masterbate.

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The power to spawn shoes on your feet, only if you have no socks on.

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The ability to make your text green on google

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The ability to know what people think of you when they see you. But you already know everyone hates you.

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The power of turning on the lights without touching the switch but only when its daytime

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The power to go your nose hair by 3 inches every 3 hours

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the ability to fly- but only indoors

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The power to shoot string cheese out of your fingers.

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The power to turn into wood by rubbing salt on yourself

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the power to read and agree to the terms or service

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the ability to make a banana talk uncontrollably to itself but only when people around it are high. the ability to make a banana momentarily stop talking. the ability to allow a banana to sing uncontrollably songs strictly about being a banana, previously sung by a mammal. the ability to write funny things but only about banana(s).

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The power to play all Videogames you want, but you have to pay the original price for them.

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Being able to shapeshift into a grandpa then not being able to turn back until next year

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The ability to know exactly where every Canadian penny within 5 feet of you is.

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The power to be a superhero when you rage that has the power of controlling yourself.

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The power to fly, but only on the moon

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The power to shoot lasers out your eyes but the first time you do it it burns your eyes and you go blind

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The power to turn into Justin beiber whenever you are about to have sex.

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The ability to pee freshly-made Japanese rice noodles.

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The power to turn into a tree.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!