The power to time travel 1 second at a time

thumb_up thumb_down -23

The ability to constantly touch yourself.

thumb_up thumb_down -69

The power to turn food into human waste.

thumb_up thumb_down +178

The power to summon unspendable money

thumb_up thumb_down +146

The power to run the fastest when everyone in the world is standing still

thumb_up thumb_down +112

the power to wake up each mourning with a fast food joint mascot next to you saying "You were great last night"

thumb_up thumb_down +106

THE POWER OF WATCHING YOUTUBE VIDEOS but just with a telephone in hand that can reproduce videos

thumb_up thumb_down +102

the power to destroy galaxies but only when drunk or high

thumb_up thumb_down +90

The Power of cheese

thumb_up thumb_down +74

The power to catch em all

thumb_up thumb_down +70

The power to focus with extreme power, only on your own focus though... Moral: Inception.

thumb_up thumb_down +68

turn green traffic light in red but only on your road

thumb_up thumb_down +66

The power to push any muffin button, but u get no muffins

thumb_up thumb_down +64

The power to teleport. But you can only teleport to the top of Mt. Everest and you cant teleport back.

thumb_up thumb_down +62

The power to make everyone you touch see nothing but porn

thumb_up thumb_down +62

The power to infinitely generate cardboard

thumb_up thumb_down +62

The power to regulate your body temperature at about 98 degrees at all times.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

The power to instantaneously teleport in front of your mom each time you masturbate.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

the power for men to squirt milk from their nipples

thumb_up thumb_down +40

The power to jump 100 feet in the air, but only while you're in a building

thumb_up thumb_down +38

The power to fail hard at the catchphra (or whatever its called) simply because you keep answering garbage when it asks "what is the jummiest!" Moral: I work out hard dammit! I want muscles of steel! And Bananasplit contains banana (duh) which just binds fat and makes me look like a bodybuilder... (yes I did look like that and would eat garbage rather than banana, I mean most "family restaurant" foo out there is garbage) "Family restaurant" guide, because moral man loves you: Mc Donalds, Kentucky Fried Chicken, Burger King, and I really need fats and proteins to work out as hard as I do... I mean I am running on a uh.. stand still training bicycle thingie... too tired to look it up.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

the power to read and agree to the terms or service

thumb_up thumb_down +30

The power to convert oxygen to carbon dioxide

thumb_up thumb_down +28

the power to die on command

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!