The power to run the fastest when everyone in the world is standing still

the power to bi ugly

The power to make toast but only when it has bread in it and it's turned on.

The power to infinitely generate cardboard

The power to read the minds of hobos. ( now you know what hobos think about you )

The ability to make everything on you invisible, exept yourself

The power to jump 100 feet in the air, but only while you're in a building

the power for men to squirt milk from their nipples

The power to turn your self into a rock that is being thrown into a volcano.

Have sex but not feel it

The power to fail hard at the catchphra (or whatever its called) simply because you keep answering garbage when it asks "what is the jummiest!" Moral: I work out hard dammit! I want muscles of steel! And Bananasplit contains banana (duh) which just binds fat and makes me look like a bodybuilder... (yes I did look like that and would eat garbage rather than banana, I mean most "family restaurant" foo out there is garbage) "Family restaurant" guide, because moral man loves you: Mc Donalds, Kentucky Fried Chicken, Burger King, and I really need fats and proteins to work out as hard as I do... I mean I am running on a uh.. stand still training bicycle thingie... too tired to look it up.

the ability to make a banana talk uncontrollably to itself but only when people around it are high. the ability to make a banana momentarily stop talking. the ability to allow a banana to sing uncontrollably songs strictly about being a banana, previously sung by a mammal. the ability to write funny things but only about banana(s).

The power to pee ants.

The ability to know exactly where every Canadian penny within 5 feet of you is.

The power that, eveything you touch turns into whatever it already was

The power to wink really fast.

The power to shoot lasers out your eyes but the first time you do it it burns your eyes and you go blind

the power to make sillet bang remove stains from shirts

The power to read

The power to turn into Justin beiber whenever you are about to have sex.

The power to do ANY FREAKING THING YOU WANT, but only when your dead.

the power to see moving objects farther than they actually are.

The power to turn into a tree.

the power to not fall in love with someone while you're dating someone else.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!