The ability to actually KILL IT! KILL IT WITH FIRE!

The ability to Hi

the power to steal 4 avocados in july at a supermarket at 9:37 am in your underpants without arms while a cop laughs at how stupid you look. plus while you do that a cute marshmallow comes and rapes your children.

The power to steal all the money in the world without ever stealing anything ever.

The ability to charge my iPhone, by starring at it real hard while rubbing my nipples!!!

The power to turn invisible but only when playing a trombone

The ability to park very acurately

the power to fly but only on a plane

the ability to eat three tons of dirt

The power to restate the obvious.

The power to remove the pubic hair of career politicians during their first stump speech of a campaign and return it to them during their concession or acceptance speech.

the power to change the day to sunday at 5:59am

the power to let dust gather twice as fast

The power to slash hot c u m on a girls big t I t s

The power to talk to anyone in any language, but only to deaf people.

the power of 75% leviatation.

The power to become invisible when no one is looking.

the ability to stay in the same place while running

the power to shrink to 1 inch but only in a crowded street and you cant look up girls dresses,

The power to fluently speak all languages of the world but only when you are sleeping.

The power to have no powers

The ability to shapeshift into any items but only pedophiles can use it

The ability to speak Yiddish without learning it.

The ability to dance like Steven Hawking. xD

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!