The ability to lift small objects with your mind, but only if you are touching them.

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The power to be Chuck Norris's bitch.

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The power to enlarge your penis to any size, but only you can see it.

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The power to bet on the fastest horse in the track at a formula 1 competition. Moral: RUN FORREST RUUUUUUN!

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The power to fall asleep each time you

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The power to instantly kill anyone you start to love

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The power to climb up fallen trees

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the power to think of useless super powere like this one

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the power of anything you do makes you high and drunk

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The power to single handily tear one sheet of toilet paper from the roll

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the power to gain the intelligents of forest gump, but not the table tennis playing ability

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The power to make a watch that functions as a small phone and is named after a fruit. I would call it Applewatch.

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Have god like powers but only on 30 of february

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The power to lick your own balls!!!

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The power to turn into a magikarp

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The power to become Santa Clause, but only on the fourth of July.

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the power to poo out of your eyeballs and they burn when you do it

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the power to become a duck but not be able to quack

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The power of HONOR AND LOVE! Moral: it wont make you honorable, or lovable by the way.

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The power to have all pointless superpowers, but only on the 12th and or 13th on january on a year that isn't 2015 or lower, but you have to be wearing nothing but purple underwear and a skanky hat.

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the power to slightly darken the color of tree bark upon touch

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the power to summon a massive midget

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The power to swear if you do not believe in a God. Moral: Meh... if I post anything against God here you guys will thumb me down and that matters... it matters so much that I will use the section over to shit talk God... yeah... thumb me down already fearing zealots... show me your true power (being Gods bitches) now that is pointless power!

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The ability to live forever but age quicker.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!