- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

The power to be born again

The power to iron your clothes with your mind before putting it in the washing machine

the power to get married

The power to Lee when your near a toilet

the power to jump like a black guy.

the power to hold your breath 0.01 seconds longer than the average human

The power to think of epic jokes but only at funerals

The power to fly only one inch off the ground

The power of temporary invincibility but you have to kill yourself first

The ability to self destruct at will.

The power to grow a mustache anywhere but on your face

The power to teleport yourself into space without a spacesuit on

The power of coming back from dying but dying 1 second later.

The ability to fall into 1cm cubed pieces when startled. No ability to pull yourself together, or move while in cubes. Parts must be reassembled correctly to re-connect.

The power to glow in the dark, but only during the day..

The power to talk to animals and plants, but only to have really boring conversations with them.

The ability to break the fourth wall. Thank you for reading this pointless super power, please like it.

The power to grow the pinky nail of your right hand

the superpower of making pointless and lame jokes for which no human laughs (except crazy ones and apes)

the power to ejaculate 69% of what you normally do

The power to walk upside down but only when you're in Australia.

the power of the home depot lisp... and as an added bonus the power of how the universe works lisp

The power to be afraid of horses.

The power to Rage Against The Machine

Pointless Super Powers