The ability to have A's in all your classes, but only if you already have A's in all your classes.

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The power to summon garden mushrooms in the top of your head every time you're having a serious talk to anyone

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The power to act like Tommy Wiseau

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The power to ejaculate napalm

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The power to pee while standing up

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time travel that ownly have 5 time before loose it

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the ability to wake up on an elephant

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The power to kill yourself with a piece of paper.

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The power to be Chuck Norris

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The power to turn your pants into underwear, but only when you're wearing them.

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The power to be black, but only if you are at a KKK meeting

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Moral: THUMBS UPS SOLDIER!

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the power to get wider by eating junk food

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The power to shit without squinting.

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The power to have no life and watch a whole tv series in a week.

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The power of learning

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The power to compare anything to pr0n because "you know it when you see it."

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The power to rotten food.

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ability to run very fast forever

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The power to Lee when your near a toilet

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the power to sing like an angel... but only if the song is "friday" or "baby"

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The power to have your entire body totally frictionless. Except for your nipples. They have a drag coefficient of around 5 parachutes.

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The power to use a ridiculous signature that kills any chance of receving green thumbs. Moral: What you talking bout foo?

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The power to ramble on and on endlessly with no end in sight with the most inane of thoughts that no one can begin to guess when they will end or what the value or goal of anything so long-winded might be until you find yourself questioning your very desire to go living if you are only going to continue rambling.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!