- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

The power to turn everything you touched into gold. A-hem. Midas, you listening?

The power to hear in the dark.

The power to vomit every time you burp.

The power to turn aluminum foil into tin foil.

the power to make a fart that kills people when no one is around you

The power to lick your balls.

The ability to walk on your hands because your feet have nails in them.

The power to turn vaseline into mercury whenever you think about throwing away a perfectly good taco

The power to fire lasers from my nipples.

The power to fly really fast but only in closets.

The power to become a virgin but only if you've never had sex.

the ability to take an apple core out of the bin at will

The power to read the mind of a cow that has produced a piece of cheese that has traveled 447,800 miles but only when looking at that piece of cheese

The power to die after life has left you old and decrepit.

The power to journey into the future of the past.

The power to finish anyone's sentience.

The power to see through glass

Absolute Defeatability- the power to be defeated by any and all things physical and nonphysiological.

the power to photobomb random peoples photos without even knowing

the power to fire my lazer

The power to turn invisible except for your fingers and toes.

the power to put paper to your nose and blow strange liqeud type substance into it.

the power of mind controlling...yourself

The power to enter the dreams of people who regularly have night terrors

Pointless Super Powers