The power to have an internal monologue voiced by Morgan Freeman.

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The power to grow more genitals.

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The power to make grass grow 1cm longer than usual.

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The power to shoot iron from your blood

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The ability to get shot, for real.

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The power to keep up with the kardashians

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The ability to walk on your hands because your feet have nails in them.

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The power to not remember, the only problem, is that you don't remember having this awesome power.

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the power to time travel to the present

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Absolute Defeatability- the power to be defeated by any and all things physical and nonphysiological.

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The power to finish anyone's sentience.

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The power to eat anything, but always vomit 15 minutes later.

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The power to crash land ANY vehicle you steer/control. "Hah finally I got a tank! OMG ITS GAINING SPEED ON ITS OWN IN FRONT OF THAT GIANT RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMP!

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the power to photobomb random peoples photos without even knowing

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The power to be a MISSERABLE PILE OF SECRETS! BUT ENOUGH TALK (glass breaks) HAVE AT YOU! Moral: More are gonna get this one than those below, this one is merely a quote rather than cerebral. But you can always pretend to understand it by thumbing it up, or down if you just fail at understanding, either way is fine.

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the power to put paper to your nose and blow strange liqeud type substance into it.

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The Power to believe you have superpowers

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The ability to read children's books twice as fast as any given child.

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The super power to shine in daylight

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The superpower to realize that if you guys thumb my former comment up, then it is no longer a useless "superpower" and would by itself contradict uh... itself.. by being useful... Moral: Hey, turning into Beiber at will is useful for banging silly young chicks at will is it not? And I will rather bang brainless women (beliebers yes I mean you, because everyone deserves some love) Disclaimer: Sexual age of consent is 16 over here, and good luck calling a whole nation for pedophiles, nope girls simply mature faster here... Fact: Above.

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Each time to show up on daily live TV each time you are masturbating.

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The ability to dehydrate yourself at will.

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the power to make my 8==D go 8=D 8===D 8=D 8===D.

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The ability to wake up at 3:45 am if you were sleeping, and not be able to fall assleeP again for 20 minutes.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!