The ability to push doors marked "pull"

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The power to moves in slow motion.

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The power to fly while masturbating.

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Ability to be Stephen Hawking's stunt double.

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The power to regulate your body temperature at about 98 degrees at all times.

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The power to switch genders, but you can't switch back.

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the power to eat out your but and poop out your mouth

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The power to be reading this when you can WORSHIP ME! Moral: You love me, I love me, we all win! Now, bring forth thy sacrifices, women, gold, diamonds, women, more women, yeah... And if you are a woman, you can come many many times with me...

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The power to like Justin Bieber

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the power of the succulent game

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The power to quote memes randomly

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The power to iron your clothes with your mind before putting it in the washing machine

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The power to smell people's moods

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The power to kill anyone by hitting them gently on the forehead by yelling "I HIT THIS VICTIM REALLY HARD! I AM A MURDERER HAW HAW HAW! At least 2 times before, then 3 times after the deed.

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The power of telling the name of ANY song/music ever made by just listening the first three seconds of it.

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The power to fuck your mum whenever you want

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The power of omnipotence and omniscience but you work in such mysterious ways that youre both invisible and intangible and without will to do skwat. Oh wait that sounds like...

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The ability to kill anyone, only if he/she is your close friend.

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The power to permanently shorten your own penis

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The power to have all sensory input interpreted as pain

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The power to make your self drunk using only your mind, but only while your driving your kids to school

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the power to give yourself sunburn

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The power to laught at Tyler Perry's House of Payne

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the power to talk to animals but only when it means stealing your ice cream

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!