the power to be a free wireless hotspot only when you are completely motionless.

get my hair more 0.000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001 Straighter---Girl!

The power to create another human

The power to be able to freeze anything, with the help of your trustworthy sidekick the freezer.

The power to find any film directed by Uwe Boll entertaining.

The power to see the past. Only the past. Never the present.

The ability to use the "wait" function from skyrim/fallout in real life.

The power to fart on a plane.

The power to be the best driver in the world, when not moving.

The ability to sit on air, provided you are in space.

The power to be a snail

To be able to estimate time between 5:00am and 5:07am

The power to shrink boobs. -Big C

Superhuman strength and endurance but only when sleeping

The power to grow a mustache with your pubic hair

The power to reed a platypus mind.

The power to chew ass and kick bubblegum, but be all out of ass!

The power to shrink your hand only when its inside a pringles container.

The power to be reading this when you can WORSHIP ME! Moral: You love me, I love me, we all win! Now, bring forth thy sacrifices, women, gold, diamonds, women, more women, yeah... And if you are a woman, you can come many many times with me...

The power to cum out of your finger tips

the power to walk an inch above land but only on labor day

the power to morph into yourself

The power to turn your pants into underwear, but only when you're wearing them.

The power to change traffic signals to anything that is not beneficial to you.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!