The power to have amazing sexual prowess for 24 straight hours, but only on days that you have to work overtime. This is actually true.

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a healing factor that can heal paper cuts in 2hours

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The power to kill yourself.

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The power to cum cucumbers if you are a man.

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To be immortal, but injuries do not heal and the pain is 100 times more intense

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The power to jizz mango chutney

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to make your bowel work backwards

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The power to buy the newest iPhone without the charger...

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Having taste buds in your anus.

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The power to have any nice guy, but they're all gay.

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The power to instantly make an accurate assessment on tomorrow's hangover probability well before you've consumed far more than the amount of alcohol which would guarantee it...and yet manage to forget sometimes you have this superpower.

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th eability to have sex with anyone in the world but have to have sex with rosie o'donnell first

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The power to tell people that you have been "gifted" with a pointless superpower.

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have the power of making chicken appear when your a vegan

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The ability to have all your dreams be nightmares that you remember vividly.

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the power to become phil collins, but only after peter gabrial left

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The ability to pee while standing up for men

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the power to shoot what your looking at but only when your looking at watermelons

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The ability to seduce any woman.....over 200lbs......that was born with a penis.

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I am derpin the erp to derp the derp the erp o o o o yeah derp frika frika frika derp derp derp

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The power to sense the emotions of inanimate objects.

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The ability to find a use for High School Algebra.

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The abilitie to tell whether or not the light on a fridge is on or off...

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the ability to discern homophobic, racist, and mysoginistic posts on this site from the actually ok ones.. oh wait this is useful STOP BEING A JACKASS

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!