The ability to catch bullets traveling under 5 mph

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The power to make only right turns. take THAT nascar!

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the power to imagine any women naked...but only as an octogenerian

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The ability to transform yourself in to a vibrator that is about to be used. Only works if you are gay.

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the powers to be a fat gassy woman

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The power think five times slower.

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The power to instantly make an accurate assessment on tomorrow's hangover probability well before you've consumed far more than the amount of alcohol which would guarantee it...and yet manage to forget sometimes you have this superpower.

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The power is to think MEMEZ are so nonsence, Even if you ever kissed an girl.

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The power to hurt your enemies but feel their pain

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The ability to keep a song stuck in your head overnight

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the power to melt your bones

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The power to time travel 60 seconds a minute

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Being able to transform into anything on and off the planet, only, you have to be touching that object.

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The ability to seduce any woman.....over 200lbs......that was born with a penis.

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The power to walk on water, but only if its temperature is below 0° C

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The power to turn into a tree.

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The power of confusing the word "your" for "you're", or vice versa.

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The power to shatter a mirror just by staring at it.

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The power to yell WOW THOSE ARE SOME GIANT MELONS LADY! And have her blush and giggle, as your girlfriend grabs you and kisses you, just to make sure to "balloon lady" that you are not on the free market. Moral: And you think I act unusual here... Hah! That is simply because you lack the ability to love... the most important person in your life, the one that will take care of your beloved ones, the one that will inspire his friends... Yourself... sadly we are in a time period where being a modest emo is in... Well, I am out! Out there, being free!

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The power to die and come back to life in the middle of a crossfire between two tanks.

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The power to perform incredible feats of strength and speed but only while on an elevator.

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The ability to grow and shrink in size, but you still have the same strength and weight and can only do it once a month

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the power to concentrate all the oil and grease in your body into one mega zit that you can pop at people, and possibly use as a propulsion system....if oily enough

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The power to read 1.2x faster than the average person.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!