No matter what you eat, always shit peanut butter.

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The epic power of laser pointer vision.

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the power to eat with your butt

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The power to teleport but you must have walked to that place within the last attosecond

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The power to read this text unless you can see it.

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The power to destroy any electronic device seconds after touching itoesajfaokpnhgåpesajfjåaeafjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrroooooooooooooooooooorrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

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You can have anything you don't want at any time.

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The power to turn a boomerang into a doggy toy

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The power to uncontrollably fart when your with your girlfriend

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The ability to pull Bleach Flavored lighter fluid out of your ass every time you see a modern feminist or a Jacob Satorious video

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The power to read this.

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the power to look like a boy and sing like a girl (bieber joke)

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The power to expel a single spaghetti from any limb randomly

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The uncontrollable power to teleport to the places you don't want to be and every time this happens... a random fat guy barfs on you

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THE POWER OF PEDOBEAR!!!!! but only when theres law enforcement around

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The power to read minds but only when you're alone

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The power to make a rather pointless comeback here... Moral: See what I mean? ;),

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The power to read a book in 2 seconds but forget everything but the title.

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the power to melt your bones

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The power to attract any women you like by ripping of your junk.

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The power to have a great singing voice, but only in the shower,

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The power to make school 24 hours , and making vacations for 30 minutes.

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The power to shatter a mirror just by staring at it.

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The power to turn random things that you touch into water, like in a schick hydro commercial

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!