The power to cause slow people in front of you in the corridor to walk 3% faster

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THE POWER TO POTENTIALLY HAVE A USELESS POWER ONLY WHILE READING USELESS WEBSITES ON MONDAY WHILE IT IS RAINING ON FIRE

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The power to strangle yourself to death

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the power to shout and make people piss their pants

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The ability to be invincible, but still die.

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the power to shit your pants uncontrollably when your mom calls your name

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The power of immortality while suicidal.

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The power to become a forensic paranoiac raving lunatic at will... HEY! YOU! Why are you gonna give my comment a thumbs down eh? AND WHY A THUMBS UP? Are you gonna hack my account and kill my family? OH YEAH! OH YEAH? I AM GONNA KILL THEM MYSELF JUST TO TAKE IT AWAY FROM YOU! BAHAHAHAHA!

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The power to spell words incorrectly when speaking.

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el poder de leer "google" en cualquier idioma

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the power to exit this site because of the maple story ad.

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The power to have a super power,

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the power to have good enough grammar to phrase the fu**ing power you want to share without sounding like a retarded deaf 6 year old

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The power to revive anyone....But only if they are alive.

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The power of self mind control

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The ability to create bruises on your body but not know where they came from, and then poke them.-.Jack

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The power to read minds, but only those of dead people.

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The power to drown on land.

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The power to be invulnerable to any type of bullets except lead and copper.

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The power to see in black and white.

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The power to go back in time one second at a time, but the ability takes one second to recharge.

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Moral man. Moral: I have self irony... which isn't a superpower... neither is being me... But its at least Super pointless and I have the power to do this... SO CLOSE! SO DAMN CLOSE! :(

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The power to make yourself fall into a ten year coma.

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The power to make my own sandwich

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!