The power to lock a public toilet door and climb over the walls with ease.

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The power to have knowledge of your power.

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The power for shampoo to never go in your eyes, but only when its Johnsons No More Tears.

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The power to be toilet paper and never run out of paper but still keep your sense of taste

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The power to spontaneously combust into trillions of microscopic kittens, every time you stare a cat photo for more then 3 hours.

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The ability to de-carbonate soda

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The power to teleport randomly anywhere on the planet, once every hour

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The power to fly, but only when pigs do

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The power to hear people from across the globe, make people move with your own mind, and the ability to make people disappear from the Earth. Ladies and Gentleman, I call it MMORPG!

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The power to make dad jokes.

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the power to win any shit eating contest.

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The power to read minds only when people are thinking of broken pencils in a bowl full of acid.

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The power to make a pointless superpower.

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the power to fly while under water

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The power to die spontaneously, and have no one notice

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The power to be a really good bowler, but only with a bowling ball that has the skull of your dead father embedded in its center.

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The power to run at the speed of ligth but only when running complete circles

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The power to grow the most sexy tits ever. (If your a straight man)

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the power to teleport to the bottom of the ocean at will

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The power to be arrested for crimes you did not commit

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The power to be interrupted in mid sent- "Shut up! I'm trying to sleep!"

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The ability to read a doctor's handwriting

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The ability to be an anoying little twat like jack moore

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The power to make it so legions of turtles submerge from the world seas in order to fight for the death in your name to save your ass whenever you are in trouble. Moral: Uh thanks for coming turtles... yeah I remember when I needed you 20 years ago... But thanks really...

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!