The ability to know everything and get anything you want, but you must poop out a poop the size of a horse.

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The ability to morph into someone else's left butt cheek

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The power to have a 17% avoidance rate to stepping on lego bricks.

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The power to...lick you're nose

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The power to actually care what these people are writing.

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The ability to fly at will but only if you are zoned out

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The power to kill yourself.

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The power to become as big and powerful as Gary Coleman.

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The power to nail anyone you want (legally) but no one remembers, including you

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The ability to think of a pointless ability.

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The power to wipe ur ass without the need of toilet paper

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The ability to breath pre-chewed cereal.

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The power to breathe

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The ability to become the most influential person within the borders of Idaho

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The power to levitate birds with your mind.

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the power to pee and sneeze at the same time.

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the ability to become black.

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The power to blink slightly less often.

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The useless power to write about useless powers...

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the ability to only eat chocolate in months that do not have an "r" in them.

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the ability to change the color of one eye if dehydrated nearly to the point of death

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The power to fall up.

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The power to buy "I cant believe its not butter" and turn the damn thing into real butter.

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to talk in a mexican accent whenever you want to say "Whats up Essay"

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!