The power to easily dodge any bullets from any weapons ever... as long as the bullets are made of cheese.

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The power to find hiding spots quicker... like anne frank and osama bin ladin

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the power to be the best looking person but only to rapists.

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the power to have diarrhea at any time

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The power to understand the purpose of life, and every other world mystery, exactly .5 of a second before you die.

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The power to hear other people's thoughts when they aren't thinking.

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The power to choose the next president of the united states of america.

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The power to turn left while actually being right about right being left so you end up heading upways down the street and confuse the shit out of people. Moral: But will it blend?

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The ability to spit in random obscure crayola colors.

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The power to change your emotions

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Everything Hawkeye does

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The power to have explosive diarrhea after eating Chipotle

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The power to see things with your eyes open

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The ability to explode upon contact with glass.

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the power to speak chinese to indians and indians only

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The ability to turn bread into really burnt toast while no one is watching.

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the power to grow stings out of your genitals

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the power to feel the emotions of other people, that are severely depressed.

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the power of superspeed but only backwards

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The power to say something only when you have a mouth

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The power to commit genocide, but only on things you love.

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The power to drive any Lamborghini or other shit expensive car you want. You still need to get a car like that though...

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the power to travel through time... at the speed of normal time.

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Ladder hands.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!