the power to quickly re-wrap christmas presents

The ability to taste only from your butt-hole.

The power to make anyone even on live tv such as news or sports to explosively crap their pants.

The power to get a boner when you're horny.

The power to fall asleep at will. But it's only active when you're asleep.

The power to control all bleach within one-hundred feet.

The power to turn coleslaw into cabbage.

The power to find hiding spots quicker... like anne frank and osama bin ladin

you have the power to se anything and everything in the entire universe, but only if you are blind.

The power of micro penis.

the power to erase pencil liines using your index finger

The power to tell the future but no one believes you

The power to f*ck yourself

The power to glow in rooms with reddish purple walls

Being able to create duplicates of yourself, however you must give birth to these duplicates out of your anus (incredibly painful and its highly likely that you will pass out from the pain). And to disappear they must claw their way back up.

The power to read while your eyes are open but you can't read while your eyes are closed.

To have the ability to trip over your own "meat curtains" at will and make it look graceful... somehow.

the power to see into the present.

The ability to fly while on a plane. You can only do this at the same altitude and speed of the plane.

The power to walk thru mud and not leave a footprint

The power to spontaneously break into song only during absolutely tragic moments.

The power to have super speed for 0.00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001 milliseconds a century

The ability to fly at will but only if you are zoned out

The ability to remember what you don't want to remember

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!