The Power to penetrate Ellen Degeneres's Vagina.

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The power to breathe underwater, only in sewers.

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The power to write a country song

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The power to breath while under a container of water

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The power to look ugly but only in front of you crush

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The Power Hear Everything that happens within the closest McDonald's

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The ability to not fart, but only while you are alone

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the superpower to be able to fuck extremely good with or without genitals

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The Power to make up full names on the spot.

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The power to kill someone by looking at them but you must be blind

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The helpers... early days part 3!: Shitfixer: What color is your poo? Hmm.. you should eat more vegetables.., You need someone to fix your toilet? Try calling Batman... Batman: Yes? Are you retarded? Dense or something? Of course I repair toilets and install showers! I am the goddamn Batman! The Pope: The less people use condoms, the more children we can bang! I really hope nobody finds out our secret reason for banning condoms or stuff... AMEN! Moral Man: People are gonna try crush me for the last one, they gotta find me first though... and I kill and eat Zealots (and pussy) for breakfast... and its nearly breakfast so please come by.. only 100 at the time though, I have limits too you know... although some still think I am perfect... sigh...

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The power to only be drunk while driving.

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The power to turn invisible but only when no ones around

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The ability to make Mondays come after Sundays.

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The power to create shit

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the power to wake up right before the best part of a dream

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The power to turn the tv off from 0.00000000001 inches away, with your mind, but it takes half an hour to actually turn off. This superpower runs out whenever you come within a mile of a tv.

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penis

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The power to see at night but only black objects.

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The power to read any language but you cant understand anything it means

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The power to remove all dirt from your skin when submerged in a tub of warm water.

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The power to be invisible but only to blind people.

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The power to speak brail.

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the power to go on this website

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!