The power to understand this: Alucard: Father! I will stand against you! Dracula: Then it is time to kill your weak human side and join me in REMAKING THIS WORLD! (battle ensues Dracula takes a hell of a beating) Dracula: AAAAAAAARGHHHHHH! Heh... sarcasm... What is a man... if he gains the world, but loses his soul... limps away... Mark 8:36 I believe... Alucard: Father! I did not wish for you to die! Dracula: Uh I lost a sole, and the world is mine, already... Alucard: Well then lets keep fighting. Moral: Richter: YOU STEAL MENS SOLES! Dracula: The same could be said about every shoe shopper... Me: You are not gonna get this one, but if Dracula STEAL MENS SOULS! Then why would he have a soul to begin with? Its confusing... and the power to understand this is meaningless... BUT ENOUGH TALK YOU MISERABLE LITTLE PILE OF SECRETS! HAVE AT THY!

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having the ability to not piss yourself when your on the toilet.

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The ability to go 100% slower

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The power to live through a Twilight movie.

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the ability to enjoy school

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The ability to fall unconscious at will.

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The power to charge your iPhone if it is not an iPhone

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The power to be HUMAN

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The power to dissasemble yourself, but not re-assemble yourself.

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The ability to fly but, if you use it, birds start flocking around you and shitting on you.

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The power of x-ray vision including mild radiation and only seeing bones

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the power to mourn the loss of loved ones

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The power to be dumb enough to press the "congratulations! You are our 1 millionth visitor!" spam adds

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The power to become invisible to anyone not looking at you or at your general direction.

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The power to smell like poop once every hour.

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The power to use expired coupons, this Power expired 3 years ago

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The power to shoot dix out of ure mouth.

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The Power to turn all your friends into a one dollar bill.

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The power to become extremely intoxicated only during job interviews

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The ability to see through closed empty boxes.

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The ability to switch out elevator music with NPR

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The power to not sneeze in awkward situations, unless told otherwise.

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The ability to make your body colder in cold whether and hotter in hot whether

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the power to watch reruns of NBC's "Joey" in your head

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!