The power to understand irony.

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The power to hear a person's thoughts, but only when they're on the toilet.

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The superpower to speak and write a language that only you know.

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The power to see through stuff, but you can't turn it off.

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The power ro make a spring onion apperar out of thin air

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The power to have a seat right over there.

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The power to see in the dark only when you have a flashlight.

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the ability to transport anywhere and into any situation, but you never know where

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Turn gold into lead.

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the power to stop time for everything... including yourself

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THE POWER TO PREDICT THE PAST

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The power to pee glass shards, but it still hurts.

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The Power to turn all your friends into a one dollar bill.

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The power to learn only at school.

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The power to get a huge penis with an erectile disfunction

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the power to fly only when you are sleeping

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the power to to be glow in the dark during the day.

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The power to turn computers into pencil sharpeners.

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The power to instantly faceplant when jumping

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The power to die and get away with it

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the ability to know if a movie is bad or good but only after you have watched it

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the power to kill yourself

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The ability to turn Barack Obama white

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The power to become a dead ant.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!