Dust-mite communication. Attack my army of microscopic and fairly harmless beasts!

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the power to shit shards of glass

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The power to increase your chances of winning a contest by 0.0000000000000000000000000001%

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The power to make yourself the dumbest idiot in the entire universe.

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The power to eat anything you like and still be fat.

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The power to shoot stagetti from your finger tips.

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the power to turn everything you touch into poop.

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The ability to perform crippling blowjobs on your enemies, but as soon as you finish you are teleported (in the same position) randomly to a crowded part of Russia.

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the power to masturbate just one time a day

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The power to go back in time and kill Hitlerr, only after you've had sex with him though

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tree powers (the power to turn into a tree)

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DE POWER TO SPELL WRIGHT LOL LAOM FOTOSINSISES

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The ability to change a food to the exact same food

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The power to be quite good at checkers.

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invinsibility to everything except for thing that hurt or kill you....

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The power to change the colour of your internal organs.

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The power to turn into a slightly uncomfortable pair of pants.

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The power to log out of Facebook using only your mind.

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The powerto become horny at will, but nothing can be done about it.

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The ability to get a joke exactly ten minutes after every one else gets it

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The power to be able to type like a hacker but you can only do it once per week and the % of correct words depends on how fat you are.

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The power to peak braille

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the power to walk on water with crocks. But only if there is enough people around to laugh at your fashion choices.

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the power to give extreme diarrhea to only your grandmother and your house pet

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!