The power to wake up 5 minutes earlier.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

The Power to Heat Food with your Mind, only when it's in a microwave.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

the power to sense the next viewing of the hit musical 'CATS'

thumb_up thumb_down +84

The power to tell whether or not butter is salted or not.

thumb_up thumb_down +58

The power to grammar.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

The power to hypnotize aliens.

thumb_up thumb_down -58

The power to propel urine at the top speed of the animal you most recently thought of.

thumb_up thumb_down +215

The power to realize that the "newest" section of both pointless superpowers and anti-jokes is the same.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

The power to turn anything you to touch into stickers

thumb_up thumb_down +192

The power to kill someone at 20 meters with your mind, but it doesn't work within 21 meters.

thumb_up thumb_down +152

The power to cure cancer, but cause death by radiation poisoning.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

The ability to telepathically talk to people, but its sent in Morse code in dog whistle so human's can't hear it

thumb_up thumb_down +131

The ability to gain weight at will, but not lose it at will

thumb_up thumb_down +39

The ability to swim on dry land only when submerged in dry water.

thumb_up thumb_down +222

The ability to put on a belt without touching it, but only while completely naked.

thumb_up thumb_down +118

vomitspit

thumb_up thumb_down +78

The power to walk on roofs after huricaines.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

The Ability to longer your arms and fingers but only if you are picking a booger....

thumb_up thumb_down +38

the power to buy a size 11 shoe but needing a 15

thumb_up thumb_down +19

the power to make your penis any size you want, only when your wearing sweatpants...

thumb_up thumb_down -19

the ability to own a computer without a power cord

thumb_up thumb_down +162

the power to suck your elbow

thumb_up thumb_down +100

The power to become invisible when no one is looking.

thumb_up thumb_down +58

The power of Superuselessnessman

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!