the ability to think of pointless superpowers

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The power to build a building that is comparable to the sistine chapel, but without doors.

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The power to predict the past

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The power to differentiate between captal 'i's and lower case 'l's.

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The power to watch grass grow

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The power to tell if a politician is lying. (They always are.)

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The power to read Chuck-E-Cheese's mind.

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The awe-inspiring power of being able to throw up at will while yelling IMMA FIRIN' ME LAZOR.

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The power to time travel to the present moment

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the ability to throw a midget further than any mortal man

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The ability to laugh like tickle me elmo

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The power to teleport someone into the nearest restroom after they've touched your thighs.

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Ultra-strength when peeing

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The power to wake up 5 minutes earlier.

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The ability not cry while cutting onions, only after hearing the news that a family member has just died

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The power to steal all the money in the world without ever stealing anything ever.

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The power to get a boner any time you want

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The power to have courage to tell hitler that you are jew

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The ability to Hi

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the power to be tall only if your Yao Ming

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Chinchilla whispering abilities

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The power to grammar.

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The Power to Heat Food with your Mind, only when it's in a microwave.

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The power to make me a sandwich without first being instructed.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!