The ability to see through shallow water.

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The ability to shoot blueberry muffins from my fingertips.

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The power to make people laugh telling german jokes.

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The ability to imitate a tadpole.

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The power to cut onion without crying.

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the power to sizzle like bacon

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Laser pointer vision.

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The power to remove the pubic hair of career politicians during their first stump speech of a campaign and return it to them during their concession or acceptance speech.

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The power to grammar.

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The power to wake up 5 minutes earlier.

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The power to have no powers

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Chinchilla whispering abilities

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The power to cure cancer, but cause death by radiation poisoning.

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The Power to Heat Food with your Mind, only when it's in a microwave.

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The power to start laughing uncontrollably when someone says the word "ferret"

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LIME

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The power to transform you in something randomly

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The power to tell whether or not butter is salted or not.

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The power to realize that the "newest" section of both pointless superpowers and anti-jokes is the same.

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ur mother so ugly she gave the devil a heart attack

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The power to hypnotize aliens.

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Retractable teeth

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The ability to gain weight at will, but not lose it at will

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To stab Djones

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!