The power of thinking of a good useless superpower.

The power to be too lazy to finish your own sente

The ability to see through shallow water.

The true motor of bliss runs on sex and ice cream with no flavor but calling august to see if life will eat us all or not. And she is. And he is. But the dance is corrupted with none-music and machin touch down there.....

The ability to shoot blueberry muffins from my fingertips.

The power to fluently speak all languages of the world but only when you are sleeping.

The power to make people laugh telling german jokes.

The power to cut onion without crying.

The power to remove the pubic hair of career politicians during their first stump speech of a campaign and return it to them during their concession or acceptance speech.

the power to sizzle like bacon

The ability to make your fingernails grow an inch whenever you like, but only on a Tuesday

The power to have no powers

The power to have a blue, silhouetted body, and a trollface for a head.

The power to control other people's actions... only when you're alone!

Laser pointer vision.

The power to start laughing uncontrollably when someone says the word "ferret"

LIME

ur mother so ugly she gave the devil a heart attack

The Power to count backwards extra swiftly.

The power to transform you in something randomly

The power to read as fast as light when you can't read

power to eat chicken raw!

Retractable teeth

The ability to lose your temper, for no reason at all.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!