The ability to poop glue.

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the power to sleep with any woman, unless your a man

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The ability to turn into a melting crayon for $20

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The power to look like Stephen Hawking but have none of his intelligence.

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The ability to change the color of your poop

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The power to only see things that are a shade of orange if the date adds up to a divisor of Pi x enough to make it a whole number, if you are wearing a hat and have recently expeled bodily fluid

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The power to dream about being asleep.

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The power to go hibernate at winter.

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Immunity to everything but AIDS, bears, being choked with cloth, Donald trump, Energy Blasts, fire, guns, etc.

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The power to read any captcha, but no longer be able to type.

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The power to fall in love reptiles

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The power to be alone

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The power to extend your pinky toe

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The power to make Q-Tips rain from the sky every month

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The power to summon your mom so you can prove she's not as fat as the chav in front of you is saying she is

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The power to teleport 13,000,000,000 lightyears but not be able to return.

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the power to pee while brushing your teeth

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To be able to commit a sexual offense but never get away with it

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The power to fart tear gas

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THE POWER TO TYPE IN ALL CAPS WITHOUT PRESSING THE BUTTON

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The power to fly 4 inches from the ground

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The power to make it inconveniently drizzle when crime is happening

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the power to turn wine into water.

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The power to fly during a point in time when all humans are able to fly.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!