The power to get an erection in the most akward of situations.

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The power to hold your fart unless people are around you

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The power to become invisible, only when no one is looking at you.

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The ability to play black ops anytime you want

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The power to control time by pressing your right elbow under your right armpit

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The ability to pass out at will.

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The power to serve the Lord Dog.

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the ability to see through any vitreous walls or objects

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The power to summon garden mushrooms in the top of your head every time you're having a serious talk to anyone

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kabloooeeey!!!

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The power to be oppressed by everything

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The power to become encased in concrete at will.

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to be able to eat candybars and spit out diabetes

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The power to become a laptop forever!

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The power to make lipstick fly

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The power to speak in only anime openings

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The power to be french.

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75% levitation

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The ability too shit out calculators every 10 seconds.

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The power to speak only in hashtags. #awkward

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The power to defeat Chuck Norris but only if you can reach the speed of light

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The ability to read people's thoughts but only in a language that you do not understand.

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the ability to un-dank any meme

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The power to break a Nokia

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!