to eat a pie and get to fart an apple (cus why not)

Each time to show up on daily live TV each time you are masturbating.

The ability to build a wall... wait a minute!

the power to the power to sit on your computer all day and read all of these pointless super powers while eating or drinking soda

The power to tap dance awesomely, but only when wearing bunny slippers.

The ability to eat fruit cake without gagging.

The power of compulsive lying.

The power to create skype chats with 50 people and subsequently annoy all of them with 200+ messages per second. unfortunately neither you nor anybody can block, silence or leave the chat

The power to attract lightning strikes to yourself.

The power to make everyone think that having no power is the ultimate power so everyone thinks they're powerful when they realize they have no powers but you have one so you win

The power to get an erection in the most akward of situations.

The power to become invisible, only when no one is looking at you.

The power to fly when your in an airplane

The power to drink 10 gallons of water only when you desperately need to piss.

The power to walk at the speed of light, but not any slower.

The power to make everything except yourself invisible.

A man with the power to make sandwiches.

Invisibility, but only in the dark.

To have the power to give yourself a disease

THE SUPER FRIENDS HEROES LEAGUE OF SUPER HEROES OF LESSER USEFUL HEROES! KNIGHT FARTSALOT!: Fear my methane! You and me in one small room for 3 days and you will faint for sure! Uncle Diabeetush: Save their parents Captain! Ill take care of their children! Captain Novolin: I have great sugar level control! Help me! Evil Mistress Sugarpie is too sweet! Runald MagnifiCient Donalds: HAMBARGAR HAMBARGAR HAMBARGAR WOOOOO! I keep American people from starvation! Remember kids less than 250 pounds counts as starvation! And their LEADER... MORAL MAN!: The hell am I introducing myself here for? Damn you Subconscious! How can you expect people to understand my genius of putting myself here! They are morons! Oh... hi everybody.. wazzup?

The power to summon garden mushrooms in the top of your head every time you're having a serious talk to anyone

the power to kill someone if you shoot them in the heart

The power to make coma patients bark.

The power to be able to teleport through a random fat man's colon.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!