The power to win any game against a 5-year-old.

The power to jump higher than a speeding bullet and run faster than a tall building.

the power to uncontrolably shoot bananas out of your hands

The power to sing with your buttcheeks

The power to instantaneously switch hats.

the power to yell a math problem at will

Shoppers today in the mattress department we just started a great promotion.

The power to die everytime you pee

The power to turn into batman only after the bad guys left

the power to send text messages while driving

The power to wipe your ass with one confetti

The ability to smell colors

The abilty to give yourself 0 subscribers on youtube.

The power to eat food.

The power to be writing a pointless superpower on a website about pointless superpowers when you could be doing something productive.

The power to speed up time moments before you are about to die.

The power to grow your fingernails at 1.5% times the average speed, provided you contribute three hours a day to meditation.

The ability to hover slightly above the ground on Wednesdays.

The power to shit out toilet paper.

The power to turn delicious and tasteful food into useless brown mush.

The power to turn into a pebble

The power to be better than Chuck Norris, but you have to be in a lucid sleep.

The power to love me. Moral: I have enough of my own. HE TORTURES YOU BECAUSE HE NEEDS YOUR LOVE, I DONT TOUCH YOU BECAUSE I REQUIRE NOT YOUR LOVE, WHO IS YOUR GOD NOW! (still not me, Gods and super sayans are foolish)

the power of mind controlling...yourself

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!