The power to make really bad jokes: knock knock who's there chicken chicken who no thats an owl not a chicken, you goose!

thumb_up thumb_down +69

The power to play all Videogames you want, but you have to pay the original price for them.

thumb_up thumb_down +69

the power to make plants grow at a slightly excelled rate when lying on top of them .... you also smell like shit, all the time.

thumb_up thumb_down +67

The power to see why kids love the taste of Cinnamon Toast Crunch

thumb_up thumb_down +67

The power to make fires bigger, but cant control them

thumb_up thumb_down +65

The power to eat food, but as you eat the food you turn into a giant green monster and have to terrorize Japan for the rest of your life. As a result of you terrorizing Japan, McDonald's comes out with monster toys and Universal does a children's movie about how monsters can be cute cuddly creatures in order to calm down those who are having nightmares at night because of your horrific actions in Japan. While in Japan though a mad scientist creates a unmosterification ray gun that heals you. Then you decide you have to go on an all liquid diet so over the course of many years you become impervious to drowning, in that time you also develop the ability to speak with sea animals with a sonar type ability. Thus rendering you as Aquaman the most useless superhero ever.

thumb_up thumb_down +63

The power to make cheeseburgers only when your tummy is full.

thumb_up thumb_down +63

The power to have your mother suck your dick dry as long as there is any sperm in your balls.

thumb_up thumb_down +61

The power to read everything 2 seconds faster than usual

thumb_up thumb_down +61

The problem to spit bars like a white person with autism

thumb_up thumb_down +61

The ability to recognize any meme at will.

thumb_up thumb_down +57

The power of measuring grains of corn from a large distance.

thumb_up thumb_down +55

You know what they say! The power to make all toasters... Toast Toast!

thumb_up thumb_down +55

The power to do a wheelie on. Unicycle

thumb_up thumb_down +53

The power to see everything that will happen in your future life when you die.

thumb_up thumb_down +53

The power to hurt other people by hurting yourself, and you both sustain the damage.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

The power to shit yourself on a really hot day with no change of underwear

thumb_up thumb_down +51

The power to change your eye color.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

The power to live.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

The power to menstruate from your eyes.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

The power to close your eyes and drift off to a state of unconsciousness.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

The ability to make yourself rich unless you are using it on yourself...

thumb_up thumb_down +45

the power to put paper to your nose and blow strange liqeud type substance into it.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

To be able to bend glass at will but if any of the glass breaks you break with it.?

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!