The power to lick any telephone pole to call somebody in the winter.

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The ability to hear the opinions of inanimate objects.

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the ability to die but to reappear as a strange families pet turkey

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The power to have ABSOLUTELY anything you want!... ...As long as that absolutely anything you want happens to be a pile of premium fresh horsecrap... Moral: This made myself lol, so it probably has 16 red thumbs by now YAY!!!!!!!!

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The power to never finish what you sta...

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The power to sleep anytime and anywhere in an instant, but, u can never blink.

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The Power to make people see a picture of you naked in their heads.

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The power to stop moral man from writing morals under every comment... Moral: The damn CIA cant go trough my battlestation, because I use this computer via proxy and can change my IP at will, so you literally would have to blow up the anti-bomb shelters in Micronesia and thus kill a key element of the pirate bay... And who would want that... buy your own music and movies? Download your own games? YOU THINK YOU HAVE THAT LUXURY? YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!

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the power to be blind, but only if you're blind

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Have all the superpowers there is in one milisecond every 100 years (If your still alive)

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Normal handsome man by day. Moral: Man by night.

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The power to talk in Wingdings.

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You might not GET super power, but you can get some super bonus. Get free rides with Lyft, (only new passengers). Use Lyft official code "IAMLUCKY" to get $50 up to $200 in ride credits. Now thats like a little superpower, you get to teleport from one place to other for free with Lyft. Get some super bonus until you really ever get a super power ;-)

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That F-ucking ass hole that keeps typing morals all the time, he is F`n annoying! Moral: You thought I was a hater eh? Hahaha got you there ;) And if that is not the most pointless pointlessity in the world, then... I give shit about thumbs ups really, they just discovered that I have an bad allergy to dust, and thus I have been unable to work out for TWO YEARS! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT! Me so happy, me love you long time. That is what women usually say to me, instead that they change the happy with horny... and replace you with someone else`s name. Self Irony... such a delight... and maybe I am lying... who knows... who wants to know? Nobody? :( sob... excellent! :D Damn CATCHPHRA! I SWEAR I USED TO HAVE A KITTEN THAT WAS TWICE THE SIZE OF TEXAS!

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The power to create a pointless superpower

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The power to let 100 cockroaches crawl upon you for everytime you display emotion

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The power to be fluent in every language but only when your head is fully submerged underwater.

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The power to travel through time... 1 second at a time

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the power to only have to go to the bathroom once a year but smell like poop the whole year.

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The power to uncontrollably fart when your with your girlfriend

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The power grow arm pit hair 5 times faster and 5 times longer than it was after shaving.

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Power to instantly turn drunk

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The power to talk to plants but only when they have mean things to say.

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The ability to get up early for school, but only on weekends.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!