The ability to levitate but only if you're touching the ground

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The ability to turn into a were-turtle when exposed to the full moon.

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The power to handle the truth. Moral: Truth is in the eye of the beholder, I AM THE ONE AND ONLY BEHOLDER!

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The power to walk on two legs

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power to blow up your own head only once,

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The power to fly but you can't go ten feet above ground.

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The ability to walk on walls as long as you're laying sideways on the floor.

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The Power to make up full names on the spot.

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The power to only make burnt toast

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Power to see through walls, but it only works with glass.

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The power to summon huge snowstorms, but only on the weekend.

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The ability to play UNO without a tongue

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The power to vomit a thoroughly blended mix of pickles, cheese, onions, caramel, lead paint, octopi, boiling water, vinyl, super glue, hot sulfur froth, and hand sanitizer.

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The power of making toast land butter-side up

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The power to discern the breed of a cat by the taste of its poop.

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The ability to turn anything into a belt.

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The power to turn the tv off from 0.00000000001 inches away, with your mind, but it takes half an hour to actually turn off. This superpower runs out whenever you come within a mile of a tv.

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The ability to have 99 problems without one of them being a female

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The power to think of a pointless superpower

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The power to complete the jigsaw puzzle that you got bored of because it was to hard and now its in the box and covered in dust

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The power to know when an item of food has been cooked to perfection, 38 seconds after it has caught fire.

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The power to not remember, the only problem, is that you don't remember having this awesome power.

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The power to cook pop tarts really fast

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The power to travel in time but only to the moment of your death.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!