The power to be scared shitless and run around like a retard for about 100 minutes.

thumb_up thumb_down +100

the power to fart every time you blink

thumb_up thumb_down +98

The power to walk on your ASS Dude that's what I call ASS millage

thumb_up thumb_down +92

the power to resist texting and driving 76% of the time when you only own a landline.

thumb_up thumb_down +90

The power to understand a joke 30 seconds later after the last person in the group did it.

thumb_up thumb_down +88

To be flaming gay. Both kinds.

thumb_up thumb_down +76

The power to be super strong, but you have to be totally wasted for it to work.

thumb_up thumb_down +76

The power to make a pint a gallon

thumb_up thumb_down +74

The power to demand people to thumb you down! (That would make this pointless power even more pointless, which deserves a thumbs up... but...) Moral: THUMB ME DOWN! NAO!

thumb_up thumb_down +74

The power to see air

thumb_up thumb_down +72

The power to be hungry without eating a Snickers bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +66

The power of bullet atraction

thumb_up thumb_down +62

the power to SHUT UP ALREADY!

thumb_up thumb_down +52

The power to writ a pointless super power but only when you want to.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

The ability to fall into 1cm cubed pieces when startled. No ability to pull yourself together, or move while in cubes. Parts must be reassembled correctly to re-connect.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

The power to post hundreds of pointless superpowers in minutes. Moral: It is always fun to see another person`s comment between mine with zero thumbs, while mine always keep the excellent two thumb quality! Lesser man would say thank you... I say you are welcome everybody ;) (A moral man original, because someone needs the balls of steel required to see things how they really are)

thumb_up thumb_down +36

The power to read your own thoughts.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

The ability to hear fish.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Useless super power? A shitbag (my former boss, now my employee, funny story really) at work heard I have diabetuus and started lecturing me in the meeting room in front off everybody as how sugar was bad, and that I should not drink artificial sugar and sodas and... ...Anyway he refused to shut up and had (back then) the guts to point at me and shout "SHUT UP I AM LECTURING YOU!" And continued "avoid juice and whatnot... ...Then I had enough bullshit for one day, slammed him against the wall and shouted: ITS DIABETES TYPE ONE QUEERFAG! I WAS BORN WITH IT ITS CALLED BREATHMINTS MOTHERFUKKER! Point: He called the cops and made up a lot of lies about me such as: "rhe one where I made him FEEL afraid for his life etc" which my former coleagues comfirmed where not true at all. then he called his boss in order to get me fired, his boss contacted me, we spoke, my former boss/"lecturer" got demoted, now two years later I got promoted to his former position... ...Before I left work yesterday, I grabbed my insuline pen and stuck it in my tigh and asked him/it:remember about that time you lectured me about diabetes?"... Funny story really, you should all have been there.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

the ability to turn coke into pepsi

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Nihat Do?an

thumb_up thumb_down +12

The power to turn into a two by two LEGO piece - once.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

The power to read while your eyes are open but you can't read while your eyes are closed.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

The power to turn int water when your in water.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!