The power to teleport 1 inch but you can only do that once a week and it waists your energy for the entire week.

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The power to make it so legions of turtles submerge from the world seas in order to fight for the death in your name to save your ass whenever you are in trouble. Moral: Uh thanks for coming turtles... yeah I remember when I needed you 20 years ago... But thanks really...

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The power to cry if you hear or see the word cry

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the power to sneeze cum

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The ability to find a squirrels nuts

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The power to see out of the back of your head but never the front

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The power of Grayskull.

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The power to not move but your always happy.

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The power to like this power

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The power to throw away and break your wine/blood glass away before yelling HAVE AT THY! At the comment below (below this one duh, you see the other brown box? Yeah that one genius) Moral: Yeah yeah, you dont get it, but its awesome because its a MISERABLE PILE OF SECRETS!

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The ability to not fart, but only while you are alone

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The ability to pronounce the word "rural."

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The ability to get out of bed in a Monday morning even though you don't want to

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The power to summon a bomb... in your stomach.

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The power to know all the answers to life after you are fatally wounded.

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the power to smell shit from miles away

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The power to speak parseltongue except when you're around snakes.

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The power to cry whole bananas grown in Brazil.

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Being a freemason

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The power to control sloths

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The power to make any woman have earth shattering totally consuming climaxes at will, but only if she's having sex with another man

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The power to vote for Osama Bin Laden for president. Moral: And to believe it could still be worse...

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the immunity of death unless youre about to die

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the power to know everything even the meaning of life but you can not talk

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!