The power to use your penis and testicles as a powerful one time grenade in case you get assaulted. (probably the most pointless power ever)

The power to grow fingernails just to cut them later

The power to look like your jacking off every time your mom walks in the room

The ability to go on cheeseburger.com whenever you want, but only when the teacher is in the room

The power to think you love her but you don't.

The power to have any power you want, but only if you are touching a nine pound diamond, standing in a pool of gold, and stabbing yourself in your pineal gland, the smallest muscle in your body.

the ability to smile a tooth grin while pooping on your own chest

The ability to suddenly realize you have Cancer.

the power to make ur fingernails fall and the go into a coma when someone says hello.

The power to speak with dead relatives, but only whilst masturbating.

Having all the knowledge of the Internet... as of the mid-80s.

The power to not lie wall you activate"I Agree To TheTerms Of Sevice"

The ppwer to say SHAZAM, Then someone says wat?

Power to see through walls, but it only works with glass.

The power to travel 60 miles an hour while inside of a vehicle.

the power to summon fire with a lighter

the power to have sex with any women you want. with your whole family watching

The power to regenerate limbs, but twenty years after you've lost it.

the power to seduce hats

The power to re-click a webpage over and over as long as it won't load

done something sexual with some type of food?

mime-o-moid. The power to pretend to be stuck in a box, walk a dog and climb a rope.

The power of coming back from dying but dying 1 second later.

The ability to turn into any non-living object, but not back.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!