The power to read the mind of a cow that has produced a piece of cheese that has traveled 447,800 miles but only when looking at that piece of cheese

The power to transform into an ant, but only on busy pavements in the after work rush.

The power to only use yahoo.com

The power to have no power.

the power to reseal bottle caps

The power to get a boner, but only when you're hugging your dad.

The power to cry acid tears

The power to see through the clothes of naked people.

the ability to fail lie detector tests.... consistently.

The power to speak in cursive

The power of believing you have a real power when you don't (which doesn't make you have a power at all, and consequently, turns into a paradox). Self-paradox man!

The power to change the color of your piss

The power to have super-sonic hearing, but only in the presence of the mute.

The ability to cry shampoo at will. But it still stings.

the ability vote up this superpower

The power to be able to tie your shoe halfway, by using your mind.

The power to taste the 2% that's real juice

The power to turn any dollar bill (1's, 5's, 10's etc.) and turn it into the amount of pennies equivalent to the bill.

The power to shoot 4-7 flower petals out? of your wrist every ten days.

Ability to make your eyes switch sockets

The power to catch em all

the power to see through bananas

the power to cook instant pasta in less than 1 min.

The power to fly only when in a car.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!