The power to give epic blowjobs, works only if you are a incarcerated, straight male.

The Power of being Friendzoned

The power to harvest the cheese off your wiener.

The power to transform into an ant, but only on busy pavements in the after work rush.

the power to know when it isn't either 4 or 9 o'clock.

The power to only use yahoo.com

The superpower of being the only one without powers in the world where everyone has powers.

the power to reseal bottle caps

The ability to create a chicken egg, once and then never again.

The power to get a boner, but only when you're hugging your dad.

The power to cry acid tears

The power to glitter in the sunlight. Especially if you're a guy.

The power to see through the clothes of naked people.

The power to speak in cursive

The power of believing you have a real power when you don't (which doesn't make you have a power at all, and consequently, turns into a paradox). Self-paradox man!

The power to change the color of your piss

The power to have super-sonic hearing, but only in the presence of the mute.

The ability to cry shampoo at will. But it still stings.

The power to fly, but you have to wee every 5 seconds.

The power to be able to tie your shoe halfway, by using your mind.

The power to taste the 2% that's real juice

The ability to change your eye colour at will. basically, you do this with a torch. Everyone can do this.

The power to shoot 4-7 flower petals out? of your wrist every ten days.

Ability to make your eyes switch sockets

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!