The ability to summon Cthulhu automatically when you reach the age of 23.5.

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The power to piss your pants each time you feel threatened.

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the power to give any goatAIDS using your penis

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The power to commit suicide.

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the power to shoot superman

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The power to shit in your eye

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The power to breath underwater, but only after someone has recently peed in it

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The Power to bite your own ear.

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The power to live through torture.

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The power to time travel 1 second at a time

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The ability to create a chicken egg, once and then never again.

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The power to have time when you're doing nothing.

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The power to type stupid superpowers when you sleepwalk.

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The power to instantly determine when someone is a dumbass.

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The power to download anything you want to 99 percent complete.

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The power to make every stop sign I see say "Stop HAMMERTIME"

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the power to fall asleep while being awake

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The power to light little sticks on fire by rubbing them quickly on the box they came in.

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The Ability To Stop Existing Only When You Already Don't Exist

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The power to taste anything you smell.

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The power to have an endless amount of bladder space, but you are born lacking the ability to urinate.

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The power to sleep with your eyes open but you still can't see what's going on

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The power to drive better when you're drunk yet run into furniture once you get home.

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The superpower to read a 2 pages of a book at once. Never mind... This is the BEST superpower in the world! [Insert troll face here]

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!