the power to fart at the worst moments

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The power to permanently shorten your own penis

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The power to think of hilarious intensely racist jokes, but only at Black Lives Matter protests.

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The power to spontaneously poop every time you see a sheep.

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The ability to dislike on any form of social media, but only if you are looking cross-eyed at your pinky finger while listening to a mashup of Justin Beiber and One Direction.

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The power to only see glass.

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the ability to make your finger nails longer by 0.1 %

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An ability to exist without any food but only after you eat some food.

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The Power to make Anyone's Teeth Clean...

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The ability to go poop and pee.

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The power to achieve world peace but only at the expense of your own happiness and the lives of all your friends and family members and everyone will hate you for no reason after doing so.

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The ability to cross the Do Not Cross tape at crime scenes

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the power to watch reruns of NBC's "Joey" in your head

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The power to laugh at Tyler Perry's House of Payne

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The power to turn Justin Bieber into a Man.

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The power to chuck dead babies from a bridge

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the ability to turn kfc into popeyes

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the power to turn into nothing.

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The ability to find any lost pennies, as long as you're Jewish

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The power to give yourself a sinus infection

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The ability to give yourself brain cancer at will

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The ability to be a jewish, homosexual, black crossdresser in Louisiana.

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The ability to eat Oreos and not have diarrhea after.

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The ability to turn into a hipster at will.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!