The power to: tell your women make a sandwich!

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The power to never be hungry for five minutes after you eat.

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the power to suddenly become extremely tired when you realise you have a task due

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the ability to teleport to th place you were 5 seconds ago, unless you've just been to a bank vault and just knocked out teh security gaurd.

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The power to shape shift into water

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The power to be invincible to every thing but fire water tornadoes bullets explosions guns knifed blades swords grenades sticks pointy objects disease infections sicknesses flu illness natural disasters accidents cars busses planes vehicles trucks lightning electricity meteors bombs rockets drugs addiction peer pressure starvation tiredness torture pain monkeys any sort of animal heat radio active waves radiation humans air pollution baseball bats food poisoning and insects.

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The ability to know if a movie's crappy just by looking at its cover !

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The power to attract bullets

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The ability to breathe underwater but only when above water

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The power to invent things that have already been invented.

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The power to die at will

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The power to shapeshift, but only when below ground.

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The power to think of a witty comeback 3 days too late.

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The power to hold your breath while unconscious.

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The abillity to laugh hystericaly at theese superpowers, But only when On the toilet pooping.

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The ability to think of an ability - JW

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The ability to cause cancer, but only at your own joyful events, like on your birthdays, wedding day, etc.

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The power to see the present.

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The power to have super human strength but only when sleep walking.

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the power to talk to your elbow

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The power to buy jerky on a semi-weekly basis.

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The power to hurt the people you love

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The power to stop time for 1 second

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The uncontrollable power to teleport to the places you don't want to be and every time this happens... a random fat guy barfs on you

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!