The ability to put on a glove that is slightly too large and have your fingers grow to fit the glove.

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The ability to add any two numbers and get 5

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The power to never finish your sentences because

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the power to live forever but you'll die if you don't eat 100 coach roaches a week

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The power to teleport to the place of where you are

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North Korea's Nuclear missile program.

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The power to steer a car pretty accurately.

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The power to divide by zero, but not remember how when someone asks you.

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The power to speak any language, provided that no one around you can understand it.

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The power to read a book in 2 seconds but forget everything but the title.

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the power to lift anything under the weight of 2 lbs

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The power to open shampoo and conditioner bottles by blinking.

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The power to buy jerky on a semi-weekly basis.

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The power to walk on water. But only when it's less than an inch deep.

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The power to feel like your starving and everything tastes like crap.

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Just because you do not see and advert here, it does not mean it is not here... Moral: Dudu duduh dudududun... ALWAYS MORAL-COLA! (aka Moke in the brits) NOW IN LIGHT AND SUPERFAT EDITIONS! Order now for the special I am fagneto edition! TASTE THE FAGNETIC! Because if gay is your way, todays morals, support this way! Lesbian-Coke is out of stock, but pre-order now and receive a moral man offer: "the lesbian drunk party invite international live!" *porn music* Hurry up! Only 2 Billion tickets left! No wait... just 50 left!... no wait... 40... no 30... 29... you better hurry ladies! As much *free* booze you can drink! *The booze Is free, the entrance is free, but the payment to get out of the building depends on how much you drink, non payers will be graped and their sex pictures will be sold on the internet* *All lesbian sex pictures will be sold on the internet, grape is not allowed! Surprise sexy time is allowed though!* Moral-Cola!

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The power to give yourself cancer

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The power to turn into a frog that fires is lazah everytime someone says "Hey".

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The power to travel forward in time at the speed of normal time.

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the power to see through windows

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Hello.. I'm Captain Curteous & I'd jst like tol say F@@K THE LOT OF YOU. Oh no my powers are failing!!!!!

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Power to find things in the last place you look.

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the power to die tomorrow morning.

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The power to turn gold into stones.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!