To have your speed, strength, reflexes and senses heightened to the level of whatever is appropriate in your situation.

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The power to emit a password protected wi-fi signal, but only while you sleep.

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The ability to talk to parrots and have them talk back to you

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The ability of telepathy but only when your targets are toast pieces, not whole toast mind you, toast pieces. This includes crumbs

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The power to tell time every other second. sometimes.

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The ability to be a successful troll.

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The power to make vegetables horny.

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The power to have superhuman strength. But I have to jack off to do so.

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The power to make a sound in the forest when nobody is around

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The power to permanently grow huge wonderful extremely heavy dragon wings, which do nothing but to weight you down and stand in the way. Fly? Nope, in fact you cant even walk now.

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The power of being able to fly, but only on February 30th.

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You can send your mind and memories into your past self, but it doesn't work if you have any regrets or want to do things better.

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The power to transform yourself into a door.

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The power to choose a superpower from this site.

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The power to die at any moment you want.

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The ability to control the universe everytime you lick your own elbow!

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The power to smell everyone's crap from anywhere you go

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The power to sneeze scissors

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The ability to go to the time and place where you are going to die.

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The power to change the colour of your right index finger

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The power to walk over crisp packets 25% more quietly than the average person

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the power die if you think.

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The power to go blind but you cant go back to seeing everything

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The power to never be hungry for five minutes after you eat.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!