The power of heating things if they are located in microwave.

The power to pee glass shards, but it still hurts.

The power to become real life Captain Arabian. Example: Hey nice suit, does the A on your forehead stand for America? ALALALALALALALAH! *BOOOOOOM* Moral: Next time you see someone that looks like Captain America, you better run.

the power to become phil collins, but only after peter gabrial left

hey

The power to write in invisible ink

The power to jump 1/3 of an inch higher than you would normally jump.

The power to buy jerky on a semi-weekly basis.

the power to make people's spleen hurt for no reason

The power to grow giant, sharp and needly painful dildoes out of any surface just by sitting on it.

Can fall without taking any injury, but for only 1 foot.

The power of flight, but also have vertigo. VertigoMan to the resc Aggh!!!! Please someone get me down. OH GOD!!!! HELP!!!!

The power to communicate with inter-dimensional beings, but they're reeeeally annoying.

The power to outthink the smartest people ever conceived, but only remember what you though for an attasecond.

The Power to die at will

The power to breath in 1% more oxygen

The power to simply walk into mordor.

The power to harvest the cheese off your wiener.

The power to explode.. you can only do it once.

The power to go blind but you cant go back to seeing everything

i remember coming up with one once, the ability to flash step, like teleportation, but it uses up the same amount of wear and tear on your body(and clothing/footwear) and stamina as if you walked a straight line there (say you were Stepping to the top of mount everest, the same amount of physical exhaustion and bodily wear and tear as if you tilted the earth, laid a flat board to the summit, and walked across it, and untilting the earth, all in an instant). where the only convenience obtained is time saved, but there would also be the issue of being constantly exhausted, the near limitless amounts of food needed to be consumed, and the constant need for sleep would make this power essentially useless except for convenience, you COULD say this is similar to stopping time, but with far more limitations, as its only used for moving from one place to another

The ability to talk to snakes but only if you have a lightning bolt scar on your forehead.

The ability to catch anything on fire, but only if it is already on fire

The power to have any game you want for PS3 or Xbox 360, but only own a Nintendo 64.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!