MARIAN PRICE ISN'T DEAD BUT SOME SAY SHE'S DEAD INSIDE

The power to know when a painting is crooked but it only works if the painting is noticeably crooked.

The pointless super power of take a shit in your own mouth!

The power to think of hilarious intensely racist jokes, but only at Black Lives Matter protests.

The power ,once a week, to give someone you don't know, that is at least 500 miles away from you, minor flatulence.

The ability to go poop and pee.

A book on how to solve a paradix

The ability to see into the past at variable times between 1 and 30 seconds but be incapable of seeing the present.

The power to change skin color after being under the sun for too long.

The power to have children at will.

The power to teleport 10 years into the past just by sneezing. You also become hyper allergic to everything. And of course, you have no way to travel forward...

The power to shoot lemons out of your urethra.

The power to see through the clothes of only the morbidly obese.

the power to know what time is not

The power to transform into Forever Alone guy and not be able to transform back.

the power to see through windows

The power to switch gender identity

The power to shapeshift, but only when below ground.

the power to get every girl, that you're not into.

The power to manage Chelsea FC

I can talk to fish.... They don't have a lot to say

To be able to kill a Yak from 47 yards. No more, No less.

the power to think 0.0000000000000001 microseconds faster than usual

The power to pee from your eyes

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!