The power to bleed when your grandmother kisses you.

The power to get hungry when looking at exotic animals.

The ability to pause time. However, this pauses everything. Even you. You are screwed.

The power to have superpowers in your dreams.

The power to taste the 2% that's real juice

The power to shapeshift, but only when below ground.

The ability to know if a movie's crappy just by looking at its cover !

the power to get every girl, that you're not into.

The ability to fart inwards.

The power to kick ass and chew bubblegum but be all out of kicks. "sits down chews bubblegum"

The power to time travel only a Planck second into the future.

the power to pee on command

The power to be socially impenetrive.

the power to evenly cook a hot pocket.

The ability to make red lights turn green by simply staring and waiting

The ability to stop and keep people from sneezing.

The Power to look mildly far away but only with something on your face to help you see

the power to spontaneously shoot glitter out of your ass

the power to be a regular person on supermans planet.

Reverse Pooping

Any telePATHETIC power you may get.

Q. How many police officers does it take to arrest a mexican [DARREN ROWLAND]? A. 4- 1 too arrest him & the 3 other to hold his oranges!

The power to do no hand stunts by using your hands

MARIAN PRICE ISN'T DEAD BUT SOME SAY SHE'S DEAD INSIDE

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!