Death at will

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The power to permanently grow huge wonderful extremely heavy dragon wings, which do nothing but to weight you down and stand in the way. Fly? Nope, in fact you cant even walk now.

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The power to fart shamelessly on the first date.

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The power to transform any valuable rock into celery

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The power to fuck everyone.

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The power to poop kittens with mittens

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The power to swim as fast as Sonic The Hedgehog

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The power to change the channel with your mind, but only to the Weather Network.

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The Power to climb on your own shoulders.

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the power to start a new wave band with a neon Open sign, a single bath salt, and a wet Tibetan ritz cracker.

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the power to view the same insurance commercials over and over for years and recite them from memory

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the power to gain the intelligents of amy childs' less intelligent younger sister

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The power is to think MEMEZ are so nonsence, Even if you ever kissed an girl.

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The power to die

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Whatever dark, twisted Satanic ritualistic superpower it took to give birth to you you FUCKlNG ugly retard loser queerfag! Nero the clit collector.

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The power to seduce anyone you do not want.

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The power to make your parents walk into your room whenever you're masturbating.

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The power to travel faster than the speed of light but never slower than the speed of light.

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The power to breath Earth's air, but if you stop breathing, or breath something other than air, you die.

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The power to LEROOOOY JEEEEENKINS

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The power to turn wine into water

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the power to turn invisible in corners but only in igloos

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The power to turn your knee any shade of orange on every full moon.

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the power to hear any alvin and the chipmunks song you want, but only when you have a migraine

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!