the power to turn everything you touch into poop.

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the power to actually make clowns funny...

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The power to have car insurance, but only when you don't have a car.

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The power to manipulate time and space to urinate straight into your bladder, but only if you are extremely dehydrated.

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The power to turn water into gastrointestinal fluids.

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The ability to change a food to the exact same food

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The power to levitate 1 inch off the ground for 5 seconds at a time.

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the power to fall asleep whenever you want, but only in bathtubs

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The ability to scratch your balls telepathically.

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The ability to kill Abraham Lincoln with the power of your thoughts. Hey, wait a minute...

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the pwoer ot raed tihs wtirnig eilasy.

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the power to fire your bellybutton lint out of your navel at a speed of 3 miles per hour.

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The ability to grow grass at the rate that grass usually grows in an average situation.

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The power to Chang ur hair coler but only when ur bald

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The power to ejaculate 100 times a day without sperm coming out and having to jack off :)

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The power to flip people off with your middle toes.

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The ability to melt ice cubes with your bare hands.

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the power to speak in sign language.

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the power to dance in the dark

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The power to change the color of foliage. In the name of justice.

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The power to come up with fantastic comebacks, at the person's funeral.

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The power to shoot stagetti from your finger tips.

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The ability to say "MISSING FINGERS" on Shitbrix.com

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the power to masturbate just one time a day

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!